Dear Dr. Lin,
This is the first time I write you a letter in public. I want
to tell you that you are the coldest doctor in the whole wide world.
But also the best one. You've been very nice to me for all these
years. But you've been also very cold blood. If I were you, I would
take it as a compliment. How come a patient can realise immidiately
that she is the problem of depression all by herself? (I finally
realise that today. It takes me seven years. Seven years! Can you
imagine that? I am getting old after these seven years. If I have a
child, he or she is already in the first grade. Oh my God! ) I
remembered once you said, "My job is to inspire patients to get well
by themselves." However, "the old me" is too young to know. Until
today, after you showed me that what you wrote on my anamnesis, I
shocked. You said, "The treatment is just about to begin." I shocked
again. Totally. How can I be so blunt? How can you be so cold? You saw
me. Why didn't you just tell me the answer in the very beginning?
That reminds me few years ago, I can't remember which year, it seemed
like you colsely pointed out the answer, I told back, "Doctor, are you
out of your mind? How could it possible that I want to be like this?"
Sorry. It's all my fault. I am the one who lives in the darkness all
the time. Maybe I've been in a tough circumstance, but I can choose to
think positively. It's never been easy. But I've done very well so
far. I published my book, I graduated from Wenzao, I am the first one
who finish college in my family. I am talented and creative. I am an
up and coming star. I have what it takes. Deep down inside, I realize
that indeed. Doctor, did you remember this morning? I said, " I see
the sunshine everywhere this morning. I don't want to be in the
darkness anymore. I want to become the girl who used to be completely
normal so badly. However, I can't even recall when is my good old days
anymore." Tears were in my eyes when I said that. You never knew that
cause I didn't allow them to drop down on my cheeks. I am stronger
now. I want to thank you, doctor. You never give me up. I never give
myself up. I insist to follow you even if you seem like so cruel to me
sometimes. Althought I freeze up, you melt the snow.
留言列表
